A poem I wrote about ten months ago- and forgotten I did. It’s definitely not my best piece of work, but I’m pretty proud of it, for some of the themes that I’ve learned to use more solidly since then.

On those confusing nights
In the wellspring of darkness
I dream

Of

The wind, gentle, omnipotent
Silent and cool as it slides through a
petrified world

the clouds, purple in the streetlights
hovering like unspoken words

The moon, reflected in a bowl at the base
Shivering, humming, no closer than the
lunar discus up above

the stars, falling tears in a band of white
all the regrets and fears
Resentments I refuse to cry over any more

Wouldn’t it be wonderful?
To hold your hand and not be scared of the
Truths we can’t admit to ourselves
All I want is to go back to your city,
your house,
your arms

All these bitter thoughts
Welling up when the candles go out
And the moon slips away
On those confusing nights
in the wellspring of darkness
I dream

in

Pearlescence, sometimes silver, sometimes not
reflection off of every goddamn surface like
a hall of mirrors

Lavender and indigo, mourning, anger. I forgive
you for all of the things I can’t forgive myself for

Pale blue, like the water in pools, the one color
I accept of my own. Still and blameless, an unending, unchanging sky

Soft blond and faded green, I welcome your eyes
Burning away all my unacknowledged pain

Wasn’t it wonderful?
Walking on the shore, your hand in mine
Spilling secrets to each other and the night
I woke up that night, I found the half I’d lost
and didn’t know I was missing

So I dream of you
feeling as shredded as I
feeling the gaps in the weaving of the day
I miss you
I won’t love another the way I do you
So in all the lonely nights
I dream, and yearn for you

I fell in love that night
You called my sleeping heart awake
Now it beats for you
I’ll come back to your city, your home,
your heart,
your arms.

And catharsis lurks in the rhythm of your words
Stemming the bleeding, dulling the pain
Tearing the scars open when parting came
Your face rings clearly in my dreams
I’m not broken there
On all the lonely nights
Wrapped in the wellspring of darkness
I dream, of you

I love you.

 

After five years of not trying, and avoiding it, and hiding the book, and being sullen and uncooperative, I have finished the second chapter of my Real World Algebra book, and grasped the function behind it.

Group like terms
Isolate the ns,
Just one n.

Or, if we want me to make up haiku about it off the spot,

Put together things
That are the same, n or six
To do algebra

I like understanding what I’m doing, I like knowing and feeling the sensation of problems clicking together in my head to make a solid solution. Finally grasping a detail that has lagged behind me for five years, and putting it all together…

It feels pretty damn good

 

Flower gleam and glow
Let your power shine

Somewhere
An edge of grey that stains the path
Not dark, not dawn, not day, not dusk
But somewhere between all of them
Velvet purple and
Notsilver lining
Twilight beginning
Showing the way to the dawn

Sunflash
Red and gold
Fuchsia and mandarin
Crowning tendrils through a blue bowl
A halo for a rising king
Defying the tall nimbus climbing the far mountains

Then
Blue and white-gold hot
That slice the air radiantly
Fill the silence with shrieks low
Illuminating the falling drops of dreamriver
With incandescent thoughts and instant breaths

After
All the cerulean sky adorns itself
Puffy cat’s fur and silken strips flying
Tangled up in the freeing breeze
Sliding away on daydreams momentarily believed
Slipping to indigo when the sky falls to dark

Lovely
Tumbling waves of gold
Colliding in a stormy sky
Amber and magenta and tangerine and lavender-periwinkle
Fingers of sunlight climbing through the clouds to the end
All kissing and staining a cyan horizon
Marred by the rising of a star

Shivering
In the darkest nights
The brightest lights
Crown and drown the sky
A belt of light that splits the heavens
A cosmic starship that might
Just might carry me away on galactic wings

I see
A haloed ring of silvergold
A veil for a silverwhiteblue moon
The promise holder, the oathkeeper
Yet also a fickle queen, the oblivion
Fickle queen in a sickle moon
Unconstant and yet permanent

The light
An edge of grey that stains the path
Not dark, not dawn, not day, not dusk
But somewhere between all of them
Velvet purple and
Notsilver lining
Twilight beginning
Showing the way to the dawn

Make the clock reverse
Bring back what once was mine

© 2012 The Sound of Her Wings Suffusion theme by Sayontan Sinha